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MidNightBlue
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PostPosted: Fri Sep 07, 2007 3:43 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Mine is usually short too, only one stanza long, but Mongoose writes long ones, so I thought I'd try to draw it out. However it seems I can't get past 7 stanzas.

I thought maybe if I sung back, he'll come out of hiding.
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Sorra
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PostPosted: Fri Sep 07, 2007 3:44 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Mine are maybe 5 at the longest. I write more of ubberly long stories than poems.

yours seemed good though! ^^
Mongoose is awsome at them too (realizes we're making him write like 10 more poems while chatting XD)
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Kerushi
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PostPosted: Fri Sep 07, 2007 10:14 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Write them? i think he is recieving transmissions from space aliens!
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Sorra
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PostPosted: Fri Sep 07, 2007 11:04 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Mongoose as the first contact with space.... that's a scary thought all in itself.
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Kerushi
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PostPosted: Sat Sep 08, 2007 9:20 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

really? I'd think he'd be a great embassidor!
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Hungry Mongoose
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PostPosted: Sat Sep 08, 2007 10:31 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Kerushi wrote:
really? I'd think he'd be a great embassidor!


I'd be the ambassador of the galactic federation.
The master of universal negotiating.
Touring from space station to space station.
Bringing about peaceful interworld relations.

Always busy, I never get a vacation.
But that's okay because I need no preperation.
My wits and my charm form a stellar combination.
When the paramours see me they rejoice in elation.

Here comes Ambassador H.M. Salvador,
Laying down the law, preventing galactic war.
When he's around you needn't worry no more.
You can be sure he'll settle the score.

I meet ambassadors from every alien nation,
As we meet in political congregation.
But they're always astounded, and reduced to admiration,
In awe of my amazing dedication,

My sense of style, my fluent communication,
My overwhelmingly vast education,
How I perfectly handle every operation.
The best they can do is mere imitation.

Because I'm Ambassador H.M. Salvador,
Laying down the law, preventing galactic war.
When he's around you needn't worry no more.
You can be sure it's him they adore.

My quarters are laced with exquisite decoration,
Arranged in a wide cultural presentation.
The result of years of difficult restoration,
Preserving generation after generation.

My cruiser is the ultimate transportation,
The very pinnacle of engineering innovation.
Perfectly smooth in its levitation.
Unbeatable in its navigation.

You wouldn't expect less from H.M. Salvador.
Laying down the law, preventing galactic war.
When he's around you needn't worry no more.
You can be sure he has the richest decor.

My extensive skills in argumentation,
Find their use in every situation.
Such as preserving an entire population,
Against the threat of annihilation.

And when I come down to prevent the extermination,
I step in to action with no hesitation.
I completely resolve the whole confontation.
And the people rejoice in celebration.

They call me Ambassador H.M. Salvador.
Their cheers go out in one big roar.
They say "Thank you H.M. Salvador!"
But there's no need, for me it's no chore.

And after they finish their congratulations,
Their women are overcome by infatuation.
They offer me the most stunning temptations.
Nights of mesmerising erotic sensations.

But alas I cannot accept relaxation.
Forever sworn to follow regulation.
I'm just one man fulfilling his station.
Forever sworn to isolation.

Because I'm Ambassador H.M. Salvador,
Laying down the law, preventing galactic war.
When he's around you needn't worry no more.
You can be sure he'll settle the score.

Though maybe I could engage in some "foreign relations"...
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Last edited by Hungry Mongoose on Mon Sep 10, 2007 1:01 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Kerushi
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PostPosted: Sat Sep 08, 2007 3:49 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

"My god thats a big one right there!"
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swollenlymphnodes
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PostPosted: Sat Sep 08, 2007 7:40 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I think that one right there was your masterpice HM.
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MidNightBlue
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PostPosted: Sat Sep 08, 2007 7:55 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Why smoove and not smooth?

I don't think I can top at that, at least not in length. Hmm, I might just go back to writing my unstructured, non-rhyming, very short stuff.
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Kerushi
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PostPosted: Sat Sep 08, 2007 9:00 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

you mean your advert jingles?
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Sorra
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PostPosted: Sat Sep 08, 2007 9:15 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

(claps)
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MidNightBlue
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PostPosted: Sat Sep 08, 2007 10:29 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Over time my poems have become more and more unstructured and they rhyme less and less and have become shorter and shorter. I actually haven't been writing much poetry generally. So I was rather inspired when I ran into this thread.

I tend to write stuff that look more like this:



Last edited by MidNightBlue on Sat Sep 08, 2007 10:33 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Sorra
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PostPosted: Sat Sep 08, 2007 10:33 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Woot it's a cool thread!! ^^
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Hungry Mongoose
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PostPosted: Mon Sep 10, 2007 12:43 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

MidNightBlue wrote:
Why smoove and not smooth?

Because my brain stopped working there.

MidNightBlue wrote:
I don't think I can top at that, at least not in length.

Well, once you find a word that has a ludicrous number of rhymes, it becomes much easier to do.
But I like the short little poems that you make too.
They're a bit more fanciful than mine, and less silly too.
I guess I'll keep to mine, and you do yours, MidNightBlue.

Oh god, so many posts, what am I going to do?
I got myself into this mess, that much is true.
Still, there has to be a way out, I just need to think this through.

What if I make each just a line or two?
No, they'd catch on to that, but I haven't a clue
How to escape this prison, this maniacal zoo.

Kerushi wrote:
you mean your advert jingles?


Cool Fresh! It brightens your life!
Say you heard this ad and we'll take 20% from the price!
"Cool Fresh? Will it clean my knife?"
It sure will! And it'll cure every strife!

Cool Fresh! Use it every day!
For cleaning the kitchen it's the only way!
It cleans bathrooms, it cleans the roof!
Use Cool Fresh baby, and make your whole house dirt-proof!

Use it on Sandwhiches!
It tastes so swell!
Use it on Offspring!
Make them behave well!
Drink it from a glass,
After a hard day's work!
Cool Fresh!
Cleans mucus and murk!

It comes in so many forms... droplets, powder and spray.
I take tablets in the morning, and it keeps me going the rest of the day.
In the afternoon I take some more, then I stash it away.
Takes some after dinner, it makes me feel okay.

Cool Fresh! It stops me being lazy!
Without it I'd go absolutely crazy!
The government wants to stop me but I don't know why.
Without Cool Fresh, baby, I'd surely die.

Available from your local dairy store.
Even if you have some, go buy more.
Don't listen to your doctor, don't listen to the law.
Cool Fresh! It's so good! It's the best for sure!

Cool Fresh! It brightens your life!
Say you heard this ad and we'll take 20% from the price!
"But what do I do about being covered in lice?"
Spray it over your body and then you'll feel nice!

Geternity_Sorra wrote:
(claps)

(whistles)
(sings)
(hums)
(chimes)
(rings)
(taps)
(dances)
(taps)
(dances)
(taps)
(dances)
(pings)
(leaps up into the air)
(does silly things)

(constructs a song full of rhyming)
(really)
(i mean it)
(a good one with perfect timing)
(flawless)
(completed)
(magnificent and glorious)
(with a catchy chorus)
(though the verses, despite the curses)
(were also victorius)
(the bridge was flowing of beauty)
(and the ending was superb)
(each word placed with utter care)
(each noun, adjective and verb)

(and then i went to post it)
(everything was fine)
(until i pressed Ctrl + W by accident)
(and it all was lost to time)

swollenlymphnodes wrote:
I think that one right there was your masterpice HM.


I,
I wish you could swim.
Like the dolphins,
Like dolphins can swim.
Though nothing,
Nothing will keep us together.
We can beat them,
For ever and ever.

Oh we can be heroes,
Just for one day.

I,
I will be king!
And you,
You will be queen!
Though nothing,
Will drive them away!
We can be heroes,
Just for one day.
We can be us,
Just for one day!

I,
I can remember (I remember).
Standing,
By the wall (by the wall).
And the guns,
Shot above our heads (over our heads).
And we kissed,
As though nothing could fall (nothing could fall).
And the shame,
Was on the other side!
Oh we can beat them,
Forever and ever!
Then we could be heroes,
Just for one day.

We can be heroes!

We can be heroes!

We can be heroes!

Just for one day.


Hey, I'm entitled to one cover.
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GrinfilledCelt
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PostPosted: Mon Sep 10, 2007 2:50 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I think, HM, your calling you missed.
Such thought, myself, would make me pissed.
You produce a good one with a twist,
Even though your audience hissed.
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